The Lord completed his gift when obedience called me to work on the Opera Omnia of Fr. Alberione and Maestra Thecla. Their words and examples are a continual “wake up call” for me.
What can I say? I will try to make a kind of summary of this long stretch of my life.
1941: I am a normal teenager. I live in a small town in southern Lombardy, Italy. I am 18 years old, caught up in the things going on in my family, school, Catholic Action group, etc. In June I received my diploma as an elementary school teacher. Because we are in the middle of war and thus the teacher placement program is suspended, I applied to various institutions for a position as a substitute teacher.
As a result, I am now experiencing what it means to “teach school” rather than “attend school.” This time has been characterized by both disillusionment and hope. I feel at home with the children in my class, who still retain their youthful innocence and spontaneity.
1945: The war ended a few months ago. My thoughts turn to the teacher-placement program that will enable me to get a steady job. In the meantime, some people have asked me: What are you planning to do with your life? I reply: I want to continue to teach school and eventually start my own family. But in my heart, I wonder: Can I joyously give my life to God as a teacher? As an adolescent, I read a book by Maria Sticco entitled, To Joyously Offer One’s Life as a Gift, and I never forgot it. From time to time over the years, the words of that book would come to mind and help give direction to my life.
1945: End of June. At the end of our Catholic Action meeting, the group assistant, Mariuccia, suggested that I participate in a course of spiritual exercises. The idea did not appeal to me so I reminded her that courses of spiritual exercises were usually not held during the summer. Mariuccia replied, “At the beginning of September, I’m going to Alba, to make a retreat for young women. Why don’t you come with me?” To satisfy her more than myself, I replied, “All right. If that’s what you want.”
July and August went by and on the 4th of September Mariuccia asked me if I still intended to go to Alba with her. If so, we would be leaving in two days. To tell the truth, I had not given the matter a second thought, let alone told my family of this plan. But since I didn’t have anything else programmed, I told my mother: “The day after tomorrow, I’ll be going to Alba to make a course of spiritual exercises with Mariuccia.” Astounded, my mother asked, “Where on earth is Alba?” I didn’t know myself, so I couldn’t tell her. Mariuccia informed me that it was a small town in the Piedmont region.
Thus it happened that on 6 September Mariuccia Bossi, Mariuccia Fra and I left for Alba in the company of Sr. Priscilla, from the FSP Pavia community. The trip was an adventure in itself because the train system was still not functioning smoothly. The railway tracks were still broken in various places so we had to periodically get off the train and take a bus for a stretch of the way, then catch another train…. This was our procedure the whole way to Alba. Once there, we found a large group of young women waiting for us.
I don’t know what happened to me in those four or five days. I listened to the sermons. I prayed. I reflected. When the spiritual exercises ended, we stayed on for another two days, talking to the sisters, especially about their apostolate. Perhaps Fr. Lamera and Maestra Giovannina Boffa plotted with the Lord. All I know is that on the trip home I had in my purse a sheet of paper detailing all the things required to be accepted into the Institute of the Daughters of St. Paul, a list of the clothing necessary and even the laundry numbers that were to be sewn onto them! The best part of it all was that the two Mariuccias had the same set of instructions in their purses and on the trip home we confided this secret to each other.
Over the next nine months, I went through a lot of uncertainty, struggle, prayer and suffering. Once in awhile I tried to talk to my mother about the decision I was trying to make but she thought I was joking. However, she was alarmed by the letters I was receiving from M. Giovannina and M. Antonietta, and consequently she began to hide any mail addressed to me from Alba.
Sr Fausta Bossi and Sr Maria Adeodata Dehò
At that time, the Daughters of St. Paul did not accept candidates over the age of 23 and I was already 22. As the days went by, I little by little realized that God wanted me to say yes to the invitation he was extending to me. That invitation to make a joyous gift of my life to him cast light on the path opening before me. I now had a goal in life: to reach the two billion people who still did not know the Lord. The Institute I had come to know almost by chance was a teaching Institute. My “classroom” would not contain just thirty students but the whole world. To them I would bring the Gospel, using the most rapid and effective instruments to do this.
But when I told my family that I had made my decision and it was a choice for the rest of my life, my parents were incredulous. At first they tried to dissuade me and when that didn’t work, they tried to get me to at least postpone my entrance. They said they had made many sacrifices to give me a good education. I was their oldest child. I should wait until my three younger sisters and my brother grew up. They pointed out that I didn’t have to become a nun to do good. I could do this by teaching school and collaborating with the Catholic Action movement.
If the Lord had not conquered my heart through his Word and his love, I certainly wouldn’t have had the courage to leave home the way I did when the appointed moment arrived.
1946: The 8th of June. I made some excuse to my family for my trip to Pavia. Once there, I knocked on the door of the FSP community and told the sisters I was ready to leave for Alba. From Pavia, I mailed a letter to my family telling them very simply that I was going to Alba.
It was almost noon when we left for Lodi, the first stage of our journey. Once there, I stopped by the hospital to see Mariuccia Bossi, who was taking care of her sick uncle. Our quick conversation concluded with Mariuccia saying, “I’m going with you to Alba.” So not one but two “fugitives” left Lodi that day. It was the vigil of Pentecost and everything seemed like a dream. Back home, all our neighbors marveled at our audacity, saying: “Camilla and Mariuccia ran away from home to become nuns!”
Pentecost 1946 marked the beginning of a new life for me: I had begun the journey toward becoming a Daughter of St. Paul! That experience is still in progress. That day, the Lord admitted me to his “school”–a school in which he is the only Teacher, the Way, the Truth and the Life: in short, everything! Such an immense gift cannot be summed up in just a few lines. Under the guidance of Fr. Alberione and Maestra Thecla and inspired by their examples, I began to understand little by little that although I had made a gift of myself to the Lord, in reality it was he who had offered me an even greater gift: the Pauline vocation! Correspondence to this gift meant that I had to allow Christ to live in me! And everything else? As Paul would say: rubbish! The Lord completed his gift when obedience called me to work on the Opera Omnia of Fr. Alberione and Maestra Thecla. Their words and examples are a continual “wake up call” for me. And love for the future members of the Pauline Family sustains me in the fatiguing work of studying and transforming hundreds of manuscripts and tapes containing their words into printed texts that can be distributed to everyone.
Lord, I offer you my heartfelt thanks for these 65 years of Pauline life!
SIS offers the Daughters of St. Paul deeper studies in this area to foster their spiritual growth and provides them with instruments that can help them approach the texts of the Founder, of M. Thecla and the history of the Congregation in a critical way. It coordinates and animates initiatives programmed by the General Government in the sphere of spirituality and it collaborates with the PF in producing critical editions of Fr. Alberione’s Opera Omnia. With the help of an international team of FSPs, it is currently involved in a hermeneutical study of Maestra Thecla aimed at helping the Institute’s members come to a deeper understanding of her role as Mother of the Institute and collaborator of Blessed James Alberione in his foundation activities.
SIS is currently staffed by: Sr. Adeodata Dehò, Sr. Monica Baviera, Sr. Maria Christina Schreil and Sr. Maria Grazia Gabelli.
Email: sis@paoline.org